Wednesday, November 22, 2017

100 Word Challenge Week #11

 

    It was a dark and foggy night. Joey and her friends were out in the park near the statue of a ancient creature. "Hey Jim what time is it?" Joey asked "twelve" he replied. "Sick" called out Sander "its a full moon" he yelled. Near around one we realized the statue was gone they didn't know if we should be afraid or not. All the sudden Jim grabbed Joey and pulled her into a shack and sealed the door but then they heard a girls screech...it was Sander and the statue it                                               was...alive.
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1 comment:

  1. HillcrestBlog3November 24, 2017 at 2:17 PM

    Hello Crazyeyemuffin,
    Your story is interesting. You have used some good vocabulary e.g. 'dark and foggy' and 'ancient creature', which helps paint a picture in your reader's mind. Try to add even more descriptive vocabulary e.g. 'wooded park, 'tall, mysterious statue', etc. Avoid repeating words e.g. 'statue' x3. Keep on writing and improving.
    Sincerely,
    Mrs. Van

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